50 days to go…

Today is 50 days to my 50th birthday!

I felt I should be especially clever with my writing, perhaps have some fanfare, maybe a cake or fireworks to mark this auspicious day. This is what I had dreamed for my blog today. Instead, I ventured over to the grocery store at 8:00 a.m. to avoid the crowds.

As I pushed the cart around the store, I thought, “Remember when you were so desperate to be an adult?” I always wanted to be two or five years older. I wanted to do things my older sister was able to do. I wanted to stay up late and drive a car and be in control of my own destiny.

I want to give credit to my younger self for my powerful manifestation, because I often find myself awake late at night as an adult. I get up to pee, or realize I am unbearably hot or on a really fun night, I am awake for no reason and lay there – sometimes for hours – wondering how long I will continue to be awake.

I do drive a car, but the thrill has somehow faded over the decades of driving kids to endless activities, being stuck in rush hour traffic, and running errands.

I applaud my younger self for having a goal and a vision. I just wonder why she didn’t imagine that car as a Corvette or the late nights being filled with revelry and gaiety, instead of laying in the dark determining how many hours of sleep I could still get if I drift off right now.

I do control my destiny…Corvette or not. I am 49 and hot (it just comes in flashes now), I am fit and healthy and I still have my mind…mostly.

Lesson one – not that this blog needs to impart wisdom or lessons – life is not always what you think it will be, but you can think what you want about life.

Love to all.

9 Comments

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  1. Fabulous start to your journey to 50.

  2. Fabulous start to your journey to 50.

  3. Fabulous start to your journey to 50. Loved the reference to what you imagined your life would be like when you were younger. I know I did the same.

  4. I’m looking forward to hearing recaps of your countdown to 50 as well as your counting up to many, many great days ahead in the second half of a century’s worth of living.

  5. Hi Laura-Jeanne:

    What a great idea! When I was turning 50 I had little idea how to use the internet let alone a computer. I’m glad that you have far more skill than I did at the same age. I’m looking forward to the countdown!

    When I turned 60, I was told it was the new 50 so I guess that would mean that 50 is the new 40? Anyhow, all the best.

    Susan

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