Only a dozen days until my 50th birthday and I wonder: “When will I feel like a grown up?”
Seriously. There have been many times when I’ve seen something and looked around wondering, “Geez, is there an adult around here to intervene?”
Then I realize, “Crap, I’m the adult!”
I wonder if my mom feels this way too? It’s too scary to ask. If she’s wondering where the adults are and so am I…who’s running this ship?
Maybe we need a right of passage? Not at 18. I didn’t know anything at 18. I know I wouldn’t have been ready in my 20s or 30s either. Maybe in my 40s?
I’ve raised children to the age of adulthood. I know they aren’t ready for me to pass the baton on to them. Thank goodness, because then I’d have to admit I don’t even have the baton.
Will this happen when I turn 50? Will I receive the magical wisdom of the universe on the day of my half century of life? Will I start to feel like a grown up then? Will I know there is a responsible adult in the room because I am in the room?
It’s doubtful. We’ll see.