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Yesterday’s blog was about remembering there are two sides to every story and how important that can be in our relationships.

Here are some tips to help you apply this in your own relationship.

1.  Practice on little things first.  If you feel irked by something your partner has done, take a moment to remember that they likely aren’t doing this to purposely annoy you and imagine several reasons they may have done that particular thing.

2.  Be willing to ask your partner questions to help uncover their story.  Remember to check your own feelings at the door and approach your partner with curiosity rather than accusations and judgement.

3.  Be willing to hear your partner’s side of the story.  Remind yourself that you love them and they love you. 

4.  Remind yourself that you are on your partner’s side and they are on your side.  Sometimes even just saying this in an argument can help defuse the situation.

5.  Seek to understand your partner as often as you can.

6.  If you are upset about something, take some time to ask yourself why you are really bothered by it.  In the example yesterday about the couple and the Christmas gift, the woman was upset because she was already feeling unloved and unhappy and she was looking for him to provide some grand gesture to make her feel better.  Those are feelings she needs to work on herself and spending time to reveal that can help relieve a lot of tension in a relationship.

7.  Love.  Approach your partner, your relationship and yourself with unconditional love as often as you can.