Whenever we look to our partner to make us feel loved or happy, we eventually find ourselves feeling empty or unsatisfied because these feelings need to come from within.
1. Become more aware of your emotions. Pay attention to what you are feeling and why you think you are feeling that way. Are you associating your feelings with what other people are doing? Are you consciously aware of what you are feeling at different times? Really notice how often you change a mood or feel a particular way in response to what someone else has said or done. Keeping a journal of your emotions can be helpful.
2. Set the intention to feel especially loving. Regardless of what is going on around you, center yourself around feeling as loving as you can. Are there times when it feels easier? Are there times when it feels more difficult? Write down what you discover.
3. Consciously choose your emotions. Really think about what you want to feel and see if you can hold on to it regardless of what is going on around you. Notice how long you feel that emotion and take note of what’s happening when you change. Ask yourself if you really want to feel that way and ask yourself why you shifted?
Relying on someone else to feel good is a dead end street. The more we become aware of our emotions and choose them consciously, the more we feel exactly the way we want to feel. Practice being more conscious about what you choose to feel and why.