Re-Calculating

We can learn a lot from the GPS and the ability to calmly re-calculate.

No one is perfect.  No one will meet our expectations all the time.  We can expect a few bumps in the road, wrong turns and changes in direction.  If we are able to re-calculate, it can help make our relationship journey a much smoother ride.

Here are some ideas to help calmly re-calculate.

1.  Think about your normal reactions when your partner does something that doesn’t please you.  Write down the ways you typically react when you are feeling upset with your partner when they’ve done something you perceive as wrong

2.  Explore your reaction.  Do you find you are quick to react to the situation?  Are you really giving your partner the benefit of the doubt?  Are there underlying expectations or beliefs about relationships that come into play?  Spend a little time reflecting on your typical reactions and see what you discover.

3.  Be conscious next time your partner does something that you find bothersome.  Remind yourself to re-calculate instead of reacting.  Stop for a moment, become conscious, consider reasons why your partner may be doing what they are doing (instead of assuming it was just to bother you!) then proceed with love and understanding.  Create a space to ask questions and really hear them out.  Create a space for a conversation where you can both listen and both be heard. 

The calm approach of the GPS re-calculating is a good way to approach our partner too.  We all make mistakes.  We are more likely to feel loved and honoured if our partner helps us re-calculate instead of pointing out the way we’ve missed the turn.  Relationships thrive when we seek to understand and approach each other with love.

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