I always find it helpful when I revisit my intentions in my relationship.
Often this kind of reflection comes out of conflict. When issues arise in our relationship and we feel uncomfortable, the first thing we want to do is feel better. Intentions can also be very effective to do as a check-in when things are working well and I have found it to be very beneficial.
What I love most about setting intentions is how it helps me dig deeper into myself, gain greater insight and feel more empowered.
Recently, I felt low, unloved and unappreciated. It felt very painful and from that place, I was able to determine what I really wanted. I wanted to feel loved, appreciated and happy.
When we are in the midst of pain, it is hard to see that we might have any power. We say things like, “How can I feel loved if he’s not loving me?” But, when we start to look at the situation from a more accountable and empowered state, everything can change.
I started to look for ways I was already feeling those feelings in my life. I could see love in my children, in my friendships and yes, when I got over being ‘mad’, I could see love in our relationship too. Seeing that love and appreciation in many areas of my life helped me connect with those feelings. And the more I started to look for them, the more I could see them.
From that better feeling place, I was then able to set out to feel exactly what I wanted to feel. There was no more expectation of my partner, no need for him to do anything…I was able to feel what I wanted to feel just by focusing on it.
And then the pain was replaced with the feelings that I wanted before…and my partner didn’t have to change after all! The intentions I set were closer than I thought and within my reach because I realized there was action I could take right there, in that moment, without anything else changing. Planting the seeds and tending to them helped them grow and before I knew it the seeds were in bloom!